My Sister is Awesome
Everyone knows someone that is almost annoyingly happy and optimistic. A person that no matter what odds they face are certain that they will overcome. Someone that doesn't take insults personally and no matter how mad they get, never says an unkind word about anyone. I am related to that person. She is my sister, Traci, and she is awesome.
Four years ago, Traci received news that would devastate most of us. She was diagnosed with ocular melanoma. The treatment plan was simple-scoop out Traci's cancerous eye. The day of the surgery came very quickly and on the morning of the operation, Traci was asked to take a standard pregnancy test. When it came back positive, everyone was shocked. Traci already had an almost two year old daughter at home and had hoped to get pregnant again in the future--but now?! She was overjoyed. Suddenly, losing an eye was the last thing on her mind and all she could talk about was how excited she was to have another son or daughter! When William was born, nine months later, his older sister, Aedan, declared him perfect. She could do this because she has "super double vision," unlike her mom who only has one eye, or "single vision."
Many years passed and the Spencer family celebrated all that life has to offer. All the while, Traci had a not so secret yearning--for another baby. Traci and I have a younger brother and Traci felt that three children was the perfect number of kids. She begged her husband to have one more baby and finally, he consented. Finnegan was born on Halloween in 2011. Suddenly, life couldn't have been better. Traci's family was complete. Her children were all becoming healthy, happy little people. The sleepless nights associated with caring for a newborn along with two other toddlers, couldn't dampen Traci's spirits.
As 2012 approached, I accepted a job in California and packed up my bags and headed west. Traci and her family planned a trip to visit me in my new home in San Francisco. In April 2012, all five Spencers plus my mom delighted me with their presence. Traci's husband, Andy, was attending a conference nearby and that left Traci, grandma (our mom) and the kids to enjoy the city. Enjoy the city they did! It seemed as though the trip couldn't get much better. Although I was working (I was, after all, brand new to my job), everyone was having a great time. They visited Fisherman's Warf, the Golden Gate Park, and the zoo. The kids spent hours at the local playground making friends and playing make-believe. Life was good.
And then, suddenly, it was not. Traci began to have seizures. Her eyes rolled back into her head as she blinked uncontrollably. At first, mom didn't know what was happening. Traci focused her energy on explaining it was a seizure and it would pass. After a minute, it did. Mom was stunned and worried beyond belief. When her speech started to fade and she became unable to have coherent conversations, Traci dismissed it as a result of lack of sleep. After all, being a mom is exhausting. Then it happened again. We knew she needed to see a doctor. She finally agreed to visit her family doctor upon returning to Ohio. The rest of the trip, my mom and I took turns keeping an eye on my stubborn sister who insisted she was fine.
She was, unfortunately, wrong. She was not fine. Upon returning to Ohio, doctors found an apple-sized tumor in her frontal lobe. At first, it seemed as though it might just be a common tumor. Nothing to stress about--but she needed to have it removed. Traci went in for emergency surgery the day after her MRI. The doctors assured us that, while it looked menacing, it was probably not and it should be fairly easy to surgically remove.
Wrong again. The tumor turned out to be melanoma. Her ocular melanoma had metastasized. Melanoma tumors are significantly harder to remove and the surgeon was unable to get quite a bit of the tumor. While most of her symptoms subsided after the first surgery, she was by no means 100%. Then we got the ultimate blow. Traci has an enormous tumor in her liver. In fact, her entire liver is consumed by active disease. The doctors were shocked.Shocked that she wasn't in pain. Shocked that her liver still works at all. Shocked she is still alive. She would not be a candidate for a transplant because the disease was in her brain. She shouldn't be alive right now.
I felt as though someone had punched me in the gut. All of the air in my lungs were sucked out as though I'd been thrust into a vacuum. I couldn't breath. I couldn't hear anything. The world was silent around me. All I could think was, "No. No. No!!" I turned to my sister and she was smiling. SMILING?! WHO SMILES AT A TIME LIKE THIS?!?! Traci does.
"WTF, Traci?!" I screamed in my head. Luckily, we're telepathic, so she could hear my shouting. She looked at me and said, "I'd rather be a medical mystery that is alive when I shouldn't be than one that is dead when I shouldn't be."
Touche. Of course she'd look at it with her rose colored glasses and see it as great news. Why couldn't I be happy about the news, too? Instead, I just wanted to ball up under my chair and cry until no more tears would come. Not Traci. She was just happy she had a chance to fight. Melanoma is a terrible cancer. It is, by far, the deadliest form of skin cancer and one of the deadliest cancers out there. Not many people live more than a few months after the cancer has spread. Traci was thrilled that she had, that she HAS the chance to beat the odds. To be the one in a million that kicks melanoma in the nether-regions.
We decided Traci should receive her care at The Ohio State University's James Cancer Center. The nationally ranked institution has the best oncologists and surgeons in the midwest (I might be a little bias, but I'm pretty sure that statement is backed up by US News and World Reports.) If Traci is going to beat this, she needs all the odds in her favor.
Thankfully, we come from a very large and well-connected family. My uncle, Matt, recently married an amazing woman, Kelly, that works for Mr. Wexler, who is a huge financial backer of the OSU Medical Center. Kelly used her connections to get my sister an appointment with a neuro-oncologist right away. Within three weeks of the initial MRI, we were on our way to OSU to get a second opinion and help.
Traci, Andy and I met with Dr. Newton, Traci's new neuro-oncologist. Dr. Newton spent an amazing amount of time learning all the inner workings of Traci's history and her mind. At times, I wasn't sure if he was taking a medical history or filling out an eHarmony profile for Traci. It was glorious. After getting a complete background, Dr. Newton performed a traditional exam and then explained how the process works at OSU. At Ohio State, each patient has a team of 20 doctors that review their case. TWENTY doctors. That's right. The doctors meet each Thursday and go over each patient's circumstances and together they decide the best way to proceed with treatment. The team consists of many different specialties-oncologists, surgeons, etc. Traci's case would be presented at the next "tumor board" which would be held the following week. So we had to be patient.
I am not a patient person. If I am going to the store, I run from my car in the parking lot into the store because I hate wasting time. I can't sit still and think that everyone around me should move with a sense of purpose at all times. Perhaps it's my Army training that has me mentally yelling, "RANGE WALK!" whenever I spot a person moseying around. So siting and waiting for over a week for the doctors to call and suggest the next step in my sister's treatment was pure torture.
When we finally got word that Traci needed another brain surgery, we were both excited to be moving forward, but nervous. We met with Dr. Elder the neurosurgeon as soon as we could. Dr. Elder exudes confidence. He recently joined the Ohio State staff from Sloan-Kettering in NYC. He explained that his forte is re-operations. Going in after another surgeon has done an initial surgery and "cleaning up" what's left. No problem. Traci declared, " I am going to beat this, so just tell me what I need to do to make that happen."
What needed to happen was getting Traci off steroids before Dr. Elder could perform surgery. That meant more waiting. Lots of waiting. Possibly two more weeks of waiting. Ugh. Waiting. Don't these doctors know that idle hands are the devil's playground??
So, we headed back to Dayton. And then we had an epiphany. Ten days to two weeks of waiting? Let's take a vacation!!! We discussed the option with our parents and everyone was on board. My dad and I left a few hours later to head to our cabin in the upper peninsula of Michigan to get things ready. The next day, Traci, Andy, my mom, and all three kids joined us. We had a week of perfect weather and the joys that can only be had when spending time in a small cabin on an island in the middle of nowhere.
Traci and Andy decided to take a mini-vacation for just the two of them and headed back early. They spent a day on Mackinac Island before returning to Columbus for the operation. The rest of us headed back to Ohio the day Traci went in for her surgery. We were all chewing on our fingernails as we drove home--waiting for some news. Three hours after the operation, my phone rang.
"Hello?" I said quietly.
"Hi, siiiiister! I'm doing GREAT! The operation was totally easy and I feel wonderful. Dr. Elder is an awesome surgeon," Traci said quickly.
Relief flooded my veins. Not only was she okay, she was herself and chatting up a storm. She informed me that the first thing she said after waking up from the surgery was, "Wow! The anesthesiology team sure did an amazing job!" Traci said even the doctors were stunned by her post-surgical clarity! That was a great sign.
We visited her in the hospital the following day and got to see first-hand how quickly she recovered. 36 hours after surgery, she was walking around flashing thumbs-ups to anyone that would look her way. The nurses and doctors clearly loved her as a patient as she never stopped smiling. Yes, this is my eternally happy sister.
Today (June 28), Traci is in the middle of her five-day brain radiation treatment. I'm back in California (it turns out you can't just leave your job forever and expect to keep getting paid), but I can still feel her warmth. I know she's sitting in the radiation-oncology department making friends with every other patient and flashing her contagious smile at each person that walks by.
Later today, she'll meet with Dr. Kendra, her new medical oncologist to discuss possible treatments for her liver. I know she'll tell Dr. Kendra the same thing she told Dr. Elder--she's going to beat her melanoma. She's going to live. For herself, for her kids, for her family--she is going to survive. She's ready to do whatever it takes. She's ready now and she's POSITIVE she's going to win. She's just positive. She's happy. And as she says, no matter what: "How wonderful. How wonderful. All things are perfect, just as they are."
Four years ago, Traci received news that would devastate most of us. She was diagnosed with ocular melanoma. The treatment plan was simple-scoop out Traci's cancerous eye. The day of the surgery came very quickly and on the morning of the operation, Traci was asked to take a standard pregnancy test. When it came back positive, everyone was shocked. Traci already had an almost two year old daughter at home and had hoped to get pregnant again in the future--but now?! She was overjoyed. Suddenly, losing an eye was the last thing on her mind and all she could talk about was how excited she was to have another son or daughter! When William was born, nine months later, his older sister, Aedan, declared him perfect. She could do this because she has "super double vision," unlike her mom who only has one eye, or "single vision."
Many years passed and the Spencer family celebrated all that life has to offer. All the while, Traci had a not so secret yearning--for another baby. Traci and I have a younger brother and Traci felt that three children was the perfect number of kids. She begged her husband to have one more baby and finally, he consented. Finnegan was born on Halloween in 2011. Suddenly, life couldn't have been better. Traci's family was complete. Her children were all becoming healthy, happy little people. The sleepless nights associated with caring for a newborn along with two other toddlers, couldn't dampen Traci's spirits.
As 2012 approached, I accepted a job in California and packed up my bags and headed west. Traci and her family planned a trip to visit me in my new home in San Francisco. In April 2012, all five Spencers plus my mom delighted me with their presence. Traci's husband, Andy, was attending a conference nearby and that left Traci, grandma (our mom) and the kids to enjoy the city. Enjoy the city they did! It seemed as though the trip couldn't get much better. Although I was working (I was, after all, brand new to my job), everyone was having a great time. They visited Fisherman's Warf, the Golden Gate Park, and the zoo. The kids spent hours at the local playground making friends and playing make-believe. Life was good.
And then, suddenly, it was not. Traci began to have seizures. Her eyes rolled back into her head as she blinked uncontrollably. At first, mom didn't know what was happening. Traci focused her energy on explaining it was a seizure and it would pass. After a minute, it did. Mom was stunned and worried beyond belief. When her speech started to fade and she became unable to have coherent conversations, Traci dismissed it as a result of lack of sleep. After all, being a mom is exhausting. Then it happened again. We knew she needed to see a doctor. She finally agreed to visit her family doctor upon returning to Ohio. The rest of the trip, my mom and I took turns keeping an eye on my stubborn sister who insisted she was fine.
She was, unfortunately, wrong. She was not fine. Upon returning to Ohio, doctors found an apple-sized tumor in her frontal lobe. At first, it seemed as though it might just be a common tumor. Nothing to stress about--but she needed to have it removed. Traci went in for emergency surgery the day after her MRI. The doctors assured us that, while it looked menacing, it was probably not and it should be fairly easy to surgically remove.
Wrong again. The tumor turned out to be melanoma. Her ocular melanoma had metastasized. Melanoma tumors are significantly harder to remove and the surgeon was unable to get quite a bit of the tumor. While most of her symptoms subsided after the first surgery, she was by no means 100%. Then we got the ultimate blow. Traci has an enormous tumor in her liver. In fact, her entire liver is consumed by active disease. The doctors were shocked.Shocked that she wasn't in pain. Shocked that her liver still works at all. Shocked she is still alive. She would not be a candidate for a transplant because the disease was in her brain. She shouldn't be alive right now.
I felt as though someone had punched me in the gut. All of the air in my lungs were sucked out as though I'd been thrust into a vacuum. I couldn't breath. I couldn't hear anything. The world was silent around me. All I could think was, "No. No. No!!" I turned to my sister and she was smiling. SMILING?! WHO SMILES AT A TIME LIKE THIS?!?! Traci does.
"WTF, Traci?!" I screamed in my head. Luckily, we're telepathic, so she could hear my shouting. She looked at me and said, "I'd rather be a medical mystery that is alive when I shouldn't be than one that is dead when I shouldn't be."
Touche. Of course she'd look at it with her rose colored glasses and see it as great news. Why couldn't I be happy about the news, too? Instead, I just wanted to ball up under my chair and cry until no more tears would come. Not Traci. She was just happy she had a chance to fight. Melanoma is a terrible cancer. It is, by far, the deadliest form of skin cancer and one of the deadliest cancers out there. Not many people live more than a few months after the cancer has spread. Traci was thrilled that she had, that she HAS the chance to beat the odds. To be the one in a million that kicks melanoma in the nether-regions.
We decided Traci should receive her care at The Ohio State University's James Cancer Center. The nationally ranked institution has the best oncologists and surgeons in the midwest (I might be a little bias, but I'm pretty sure that statement is backed up by US News and World Reports.) If Traci is going to beat this, she needs all the odds in her favor.
Thankfully, we come from a very large and well-connected family. My uncle, Matt, recently married an amazing woman, Kelly, that works for Mr. Wexler, who is a huge financial backer of the OSU Medical Center. Kelly used her connections to get my sister an appointment with a neuro-oncologist right away. Within three weeks of the initial MRI, we were on our way to OSU to get a second opinion and help.
Traci, Andy and I met with Dr. Newton, Traci's new neuro-oncologist. Dr. Newton spent an amazing amount of time learning all the inner workings of Traci's history and her mind. At times, I wasn't sure if he was taking a medical history or filling out an eHarmony profile for Traci. It was glorious. After getting a complete background, Dr. Newton performed a traditional exam and then explained how the process works at OSU. At Ohio State, each patient has a team of 20 doctors that review their case. TWENTY doctors. That's right. The doctors meet each Thursday and go over each patient's circumstances and together they decide the best way to proceed with treatment. The team consists of many different specialties-oncologists, surgeons, etc. Traci's case would be presented at the next "tumor board" which would be held the following week. So we had to be patient.
I am not a patient person. If I am going to the store, I run from my car in the parking lot into the store because I hate wasting time. I can't sit still and think that everyone around me should move with a sense of purpose at all times. Perhaps it's my Army training that has me mentally yelling, "RANGE WALK!" whenever I spot a person moseying around. So siting and waiting for over a week for the doctors to call and suggest the next step in my sister's treatment was pure torture.
When we finally got word that Traci needed another brain surgery, we were both excited to be moving forward, but nervous. We met with Dr. Elder the neurosurgeon as soon as we could. Dr. Elder exudes confidence. He recently joined the Ohio State staff from Sloan-Kettering in NYC. He explained that his forte is re-operations. Going in after another surgeon has done an initial surgery and "cleaning up" what's left. No problem. Traci declared, " I am going to beat this, so just tell me what I need to do to make that happen."
What needed to happen was getting Traci off steroids before Dr. Elder could perform surgery. That meant more waiting. Lots of waiting. Possibly two more weeks of waiting. Ugh. Waiting. Don't these doctors know that idle hands are the devil's playground??
So, we headed back to Dayton. And then we had an epiphany. Ten days to two weeks of waiting? Let's take a vacation!!! We discussed the option with our parents and everyone was on board. My dad and I left a few hours later to head to our cabin in the upper peninsula of Michigan to get things ready. The next day, Traci, Andy, my mom, and all three kids joined us. We had a week of perfect weather and the joys that can only be had when spending time in a small cabin on an island in the middle of nowhere.
Traci and Andy decided to take a mini-vacation for just the two of them and headed back early. They spent a day on Mackinac Island before returning to Columbus for the operation. The rest of us headed back to Ohio the day Traci went in for her surgery. We were all chewing on our fingernails as we drove home--waiting for some news. Three hours after the operation, my phone rang.
"Hello?" I said quietly.
"Hi, siiiiister! I'm doing GREAT! The operation was totally easy and I feel wonderful. Dr. Elder is an awesome surgeon," Traci said quickly.
Relief flooded my veins. Not only was she okay, she was herself and chatting up a storm. She informed me that the first thing she said after waking up from the surgery was, "Wow! The anesthesiology team sure did an amazing job!" Traci said even the doctors were stunned by her post-surgical clarity! That was a great sign.
We visited her in the hospital the following day and got to see first-hand how quickly she recovered. 36 hours after surgery, she was walking around flashing thumbs-ups to anyone that would look her way. The nurses and doctors clearly loved her as a patient as she never stopped smiling. Yes, this is my eternally happy sister.
Today (June 28), Traci is in the middle of her five-day brain radiation treatment. I'm back in California (it turns out you can't just leave your job forever and expect to keep getting paid), but I can still feel her warmth. I know she's sitting in the radiation-oncology department making friends with every other patient and flashing her contagious smile at each person that walks by.
Later today, she'll meet with Dr. Kendra, her new medical oncologist to discuss possible treatments for her liver. I know she'll tell Dr. Kendra the same thing she told Dr. Elder--she's going to beat her melanoma. She's going to live. For herself, for her kids, for her family--she is going to survive. She's ready to do whatever it takes. She's ready now and she's POSITIVE she's going to win. She's just positive. She's happy. And as she says, no matter what: "How wonderful. How wonderful. All things are perfect, just as they are."
AN UPDATE (or two)!
Traci met with her medical oncologist. Dr. Kendra couldn't tell us much about what kind of treatment will be best for Traci until they run some tests on her particular cancer. The doctors need to know if it is a slow-growing tumor in her liver or one that is moving at hyper-speed. Since we don't know how long the little bugger has been there, we don't know how fast it's been expanding it's empire.
If it's a slow growing tumor, the best option will be immunotherapy--which is giving Traci drugs that focus her own immune system on attacking the cancer cells. The drugs help her body recognize the cancer as something that needs to be given eviction papers and helps find the right muscles to kick the unwelcome guests out. This works in about 20% of patients, so that's good news. Traci has a really strong immune system already, so I'm hoping this is the treatment plan.
If it's a fast growing tumor, the crystal ball says chemo is in her future. I don't have much to say about this treatment because, well, to be quite frank, I don't really know much about it.
No matter what the future brings (we should know the type of tumor she has soon), I know that Traci will be going in to battle with a big smile and the will to win.
If it's a slow growing tumor, the best option will be immunotherapy--which is giving Traci drugs that focus her own immune system on attacking the cancer cells. The drugs help her body recognize the cancer as something that needs to be given eviction papers and helps find the right muscles to kick the unwelcome guests out. This works in about 20% of patients, so that's good news. Traci has a really strong immune system already, so I'm hoping this is the treatment plan.
If it's a fast growing tumor, the crystal ball says chemo is in her future. I don't have much to say about this treatment because, well, to be quite frank, I don't really know much about it.
No matter what the future brings (we should know the type of tumor she has soon), I know that Traci will be going in to battle with a big smile and the will to win.
Rain on our Parade
The thunderous storms that blew through Columbus today also blew some bad news our way. Traci's liver tumor is extremely fast growing, which means we need to take immediate action. There's no time to waste. The doctor ran some blood tests and Traci, always the over achiever, had numbers that were off the charts (in a bad way). "Remarkable," we've been told. Remarkable she's even alive to fight this battle.
Monday will bring round one of Paclitaxel and Carboplatin, which are fancy types of chemotherapy that will hopefully slow the tumor growth so much that it's shrinking. Dr. Kendra is optimistic about the chemo. I fully expect the tumor to melt away, much like the Wicked Witch of the West after water's been dumped on her at the end of Wizard of Oz. I do not expect it to be like "Elphaba (sp?)" in "Wicked" who doesn't actually die, but fakes her own death so she can live a new life somewhere else. I expect the tumor to be dead and gone forever after the chemo. DIE CANCER, DIE!!!!!
Monday will bring round one of Paclitaxel and Carboplatin, which are fancy types of chemotherapy that will hopefully slow the tumor growth so much that it's shrinking. Dr. Kendra is optimistic about the chemo. I fully expect the tumor to melt away, much like the Wicked Witch of the West after water's been dumped on her at the end of Wizard of Oz. I do not expect it to be like "Elphaba (sp?)" in "Wicked" who doesn't actually die, but fakes her own death so she can live a new life somewhere else. I expect the tumor to be dead and gone forever after the chemo. DIE CANCER, DIE!!!!!
Chemo Shlemo Blemo
Each day brings new challenges. Today's challenge: Round one of chemotherapy!
I agree, this is not a standard challenge for most of us, but then again, most of us are not as awesome as Traci is. She likes to take on the most daunting of challenges and then make them look like they are things any preschooler could conquer...blindfolded...with one arm.
This morning Traci (and mom) reported to Ohio State to receive the first of three delightful IV infusions of cancer-killing super drugs. Because the need for this treatment was so immediate after last week's testing, there was no time for the hospital to schedule the placement of a port. That means that Traci is getting her IV the good old fashioned way--in her hand. Lucky goose. Instead of getting a lovely port placed in her chest, she gets to feel the delightful sensation of having cold-hearted, super-war-fighting fluids be pumped into her soon-to-be-numb appendage. I'd say I'm jealous, but it would be a lie.
If you're wondering what it's like to receive chemotherapy, Traci suggests watching the episode "Stage Two" episode of Archer. (You can find it on Netflix or possibly on YouTube.) It's fun to know the writers and animators could accurately represent reality.
As expected, nausea has been the first side effect to show it's ugly face--but also, as expected, this little annoyance has been combated by some delightful anti-nausea drugs. Hooray! Go Team Traci's doctors & nurses!
The chemotherapy is expected to last about four hours. That's a long time to sit around while drugs are pumped into your body, so I'm trying to come up with a list of things Traci can do to pass the time. So far I have the following:
1. Check/update Facebook. (Ok, this is a boring suggestion, but if you know Traci, you know that she used to get on Facebook about once a year and for about five seconds. This is an amazing opportunity for her to get way ahead in her social networking. She could spent hours coming up with clever status updates and or comments. I'm so jealous.)
2. Read/respond to emails. (See comments from #1.)
3. Read a book. (If you haven't noticed, yet, I added a tab at the top that suggests ways you can help. One of the suggestions is to make book recommendations and then get those books from the library/bookstore and deliver them to Traci for her entertainment. As Nike says, "Just do it.")
4. Write a story. (Suggested topics are listed on the Help tab as well.)
5. Bedazzle something. (This is inspired by the lady across from me at Starbucks today that is wearing a bedazzled sweater. Yes, sweater. Awesome.)
6. Learn something from the interwebs. Like how to become a hacker. If you can master that, you can really mess with the people around you whom are also receiving chemo. Wouldn't that be fun?!
7. Finish writing/illustrating Compass. I have been left hanging for what seems like YEARS. Seriously, dude. I need to know what happens with Jay and Pheobe.
8. Practice Chinese. Loudly.
9. Get caught up on funny websites. A few suggestions: www.failbook.com, www.passiveaggressivenotes.com, www.uhpinons.com, www.lamebook.com, www.winningateverything.com, etc.
10. Make mix CDs for everyone you know.
11. Memorize all of the questions and answers from Trivial Pursuit and then challenge your family/friends to a game. Mwa ha ha ha ha.
12. Write poetry. It's better if it rhymes and is iambic pentameter. Just saying.
Lucky-ducky Traci gets to experience the thrills of chemotherapy for one full day every three weeks. Directly after completing each session, Traci's immune system will be really busy helping the super-drugs destroy the cancer invaders, so it's going to be important that Traci is not exposed to any unnecessary germs. Thus, we will begin to call her "bubble girl." Now, this is realizing Traci's absolute worst fears, so it's important to rub it in her face. I'm pretty sure the best way to let someone know you care is to be mean to them. Just ask Logan, the kid from my third-grade class that used to push me on the playground and pull my hair. Hurting someone is the best way to show you care. (Sidenote: this paragraph was much more cleverly worded about five minutes ago, but then my computer went on the fritz and deleted all of my hard-thought-out words. In my frustration, I refused to try and duplicate their effectiveness, so you're left with the above. Sorry, I'm a bum.)
I agree, this is not a standard challenge for most of us, but then again, most of us are not as awesome as Traci is. She likes to take on the most daunting of challenges and then make them look like they are things any preschooler could conquer...blindfolded...with one arm.
This morning Traci (and mom) reported to Ohio State to receive the first of three delightful IV infusions of cancer-killing super drugs. Because the need for this treatment was so immediate after last week's testing, there was no time for the hospital to schedule the placement of a port. That means that Traci is getting her IV the good old fashioned way--in her hand. Lucky goose. Instead of getting a lovely port placed in her chest, she gets to feel the delightful sensation of having cold-hearted, super-war-fighting fluids be pumped into her soon-to-be-numb appendage. I'd say I'm jealous, but it would be a lie.
If you're wondering what it's like to receive chemotherapy, Traci suggests watching the episode "Stage Two" episode of Archer. (You can find it on Netflix or possibly on YouTube.) It's fun to know the writers and animators could accurately represent reality.
As expected, nausea has been the first side effect to show it's ugly face--but also, as expected, this little annoyance has been combated by some delightful anti-nausea drugs. Hooray! Go Team Traci's doctors & nurses!
The chemotherapy is expected to last about four hours. That's a long time to sit around while drugs are pumped into your body, so I'm trying to come up with a list of things Traci can do to pass the time. So far I have the following:
1. Check/update Facebook. (Ok, this is a boring suggestion, but if you know Traci, you know that she used to get on Facebook about once a year and for about five seconds. This is an amazing opportunity for her to get way ahead in her social networking. She could spent hours coming up with clever status updates and or comments. I'm so jealous.)
2. Read/respond to emails. (See comments from #1.)
3. Read a book. (If you haven't noticed, yet, I added a tab at the top that suggests ways you can help. One of the suggestions is to make book recommendations and then get those books from the library/bookstore and deliver them to Traci for her entertainment. As Nike says, "Just do it.")
4. Write a story. (Suggested topics are listed on the Help tab as well.)
5. Bedazzle something. (This is inspired by the lady across from me at Starbucks today that is wearing a bedazzled sweater. Yes, sweater. Awesome.)
6. Learn something from the interwebs. Like how to become a hacker. If you can master that, you can really mess with the people around you whom are also receiving chemo. Wouldn't that be fun?!
7. Finish writing/illustrating Compass. I have been left hanging for what seems like YEARS. Seriously, dude. I need to know what happens with Jay and Pheobe.
8. Practice Chinese. Loudly.
9. Get caught up on funny websites. A few suggestions: www.failbook.com, www.passiveaggressivenotes.com, www.uhpinons.com, www.lamebook.com, www.winningateverything.com, etc.
10. Make mix CDs for everyone you know.
11. Memorize all of the questions and answers from Trivial Pursuit and then challenge your family/friends to a game. Mwa ha ha ha ha.
12. Write poetry. It's better if it rhymes and is iambic pentameter. Just saying.
Lucky-ducky Traci gets to experience the thrills of chemotherapy for one full day every three weeks. Directly after completing each session, Traci's immune system will be really busy helping the super-drugs destroy the cancer invaders, so it's going to be important that Traci is not exposed to any unnecessary germs. Thus, we will begin to call her "bubble girl." Now, this is realizing Traci's absolute worst fears, so it's important to rub it in her face. I'm pretty sure the best way to let someone know you care is to be mean to them. Just ask Logan, the kid from my third-grade class that used to push me on the playground and pull my hair. Hurting someone is the best way to show you care. (Sidenote: this paragraph was much more cleverly worded about five minutes ago, but then my computer went on the fritz and deleted all of my hard-thought-out words. In my frustration, I refused to try and duplicate their effectiveness, so you're left with the above. Sorry, I'm a bum.)
What goes up....or in this case down...
Turns out that not even Super-Traci can avoid the side effects of chemotherapy. Nausea? Check. Nausea? Check. More nausea? check. When Traci voluntarily lays down for a nap, you know she's really not feeling great. If anyone has tips for keeping the sick feelings at bay, we're listening!
In the meantime, Traci and our mom are headed back to OSU for a CAT scan to check on tumor growth. This scan will be used as the baseline scan to compare the tumor's activity post-chemo.
In the meantime, Traci and our mom are headed back to OSU for a CAT scan to check on tumor growth. This scan will be used as the baseline scan to compare the tumor's activity post-chemo.
Medical Meditation (or MRIs vs CAT scans)
Meditation usually conjures images of waterfalls, flowing beaches or peaceful meadows. When I prepare my mind to relax, I am usually in a quiet, dark place with quiet music or the soft sounds of nature echoing in the background. Traci does not.
Lately, her happy place has been the MRI table. As it turns out, these scans are for more relaxing that one might think. In order to receive an MRI, a patient is given an IV of contrast solution and then escorted to a large piece of medical equipment where he or she lays on a metal bed. In Traci's case, her head is placed inside a tube where the machine scans her brain. As the machine scans, it emits a series of beeps while humming. To most of us, this might sound rather annoying; however, Traci finds it quite calming. There are lights that come and go. Traci typically closes her eyes and pictures herself being transported in and out of the sun as the lights alternate. The beeps become familiar and the hum, calming.
After each MRI, Traci would emerge from the back room quiet, calm and looking oddly content. She's come to look forward to each MRI and the quiet meditation that comes with each one.
When Traci learned she was to have a CAT scan today (July 5), she was looking forward to it. So far, each scan has brought peace. Unfortunately, CAT scans do not lend themselves to the same medical meditation that MRIs do.
First, Traci had to drink the contrast solution rather than receive it in the form of an IV. While this, at first, seems as though it might be appealing, she still had to get an IV! Now she had an IV AND a terrible taste in her mouth from the icky solution. What a way to start.
Next, she was escorted to the CAT machine. It appeared to be a metal table that was surrounded by a large donut. There's not much Traci likes less than donuts...so a particularly large, metal donut did not exactly make her want to dance a jig. As she got herself situated on the table, she closed her eyes and prepared for her mental journey into the sun.
Suddenly, she heard a robotic man's voice. "Take a deep breath."
"Wait, what?!" Traci's eyes shot open. That's not very relaxing.
"Exhale." The voice instructed.
"Oh, jeez," thought Traci. This is not relaxing at all. The voice continued to bark instructions such as, "Breathe normally, now." and "Hold your breath." The whole scan only lasted a few minutes, unlike the MRIs that could last nearly an hour.
In the end, Traci declared a detailed MRI the best way to get in some medical meditation.
Lately, her happy place has been the MRI table. As it turns out, these scans are for more relaxing that one might think. In order to receive an MRI, a patient is given an IV of contrast solution and then escorted to a large piece of medical equipment where he or she lays on a metal bed. In Traci's case, her head is placed inside a tube where the machine scans her brain. As the machine scans, it emits a series of beeps while humming. To most of us, this might sound rather annoying; however, Traci finds it quite calming. There are lights that come and go. Traci typically closes her eyes and pictures herself being transported in and out of the sun as the lights alternate. The beeps become familiar and the hum, calming.
After each MRI, Traci would emerge from the back room quiet, calm and looking oddly content. She's come to look forward to each MRI and the quiet meditation that comes with each one.
When Traci learned she was to have a CAT scan today (July 5), she was looking forward to it. So far, each scan has brought peace. Unfortunately, CAT scans do not lend themselves to the same medical meditation that MRIs do.
First, Traci had to drink the contrast solution rather than receive it in the form of an IV. While this, at first, seems as though it might be appealing, she still had to get an IV! Now she had an IV AND a terrible taste in her mouth from the icky solution. What a way to start.
Next, she was escorted to the CAT machine. It appeared to be a metal table that was surrounded by a large donut. There's not much Traci likes less than donuts...so a particularly large, metal donut did not exactly make her want to dance a jig. As she got herself situated on the table, she closed her eyes and prepared for her mental journey into the sun.
Suddenly, she heard a robotic man's voice. "Take a deep breath."
"Wait, what?!" Traci's eyes shot open. That's not very relaxing.
"Exhale." The voice instructed.
"Oh, jeez," thought Traci. This is not relaxing at all. The voice continued to bark instructions such as, "Breathe normally, now." and "Hold your breath." The whole scan only lasted a few minutes, unlike the MRIs that could last nearly an hour.
In the end, Traci declared a detailed MRI the best way to get in some medical meditation.
The Port-y Pooper
I admit it, the title of this is a bit of a stretch. But then again, Traci's veins have had to stretch tremendously as well since she got a port placed in her chest, sooo....maybe....? No? Okay. I tried.
Yesterday (July 10), Traci had a chemo port placed in her chest. This was Traci's first "true surgery" (her words, not mine. Before this, all she had were "procedures." What's the difference? Never before has there been a need to slice through muscles, obviously.) and the lesson she learned is, "surgery sucks." I'm sure the suckiness is compounded by the fact that she had what looks like a matchbox placed in her chest and a tube the size of a power cord jammed down her vena cava from clavicle to her heart. That cannot be comfortable.
Ever since the surgery, Traci has felt less than stellar. Apparently, there is a lot of pain associated with having something foreign inserted in your chest. One of the things Traci struggles to do is take it easy. She definitely tries to jam as much in to each day as humanly possible. Despite feeling like a party pooper, Traci still pushes herself to be social and to help around the house. She's really quite incredible. If we can just convince her that it is okay to take a break now and again and just let herself recover, I think she'll continue to be the awesome person we know she is.
Yesterday (July 10), Traci had a chemo port placed in her chest. This was Traci's first "true surgery" (her words, not mine. Before this, all she had were "procedures." What's the difference? Never before has there been a need to slice through muscles, obviously.) and the lesson she learned is, "surgery sucks." I'm sure the suckiness is compounded by the fact that she had what looks like a matchbox placed in her chest and a tube the size of a power cord jammed down her vena cava from clavicle to her heart. That cannot be comfortable.
Ever since the surgery, Traci has felt less than stellar. Apparently, there is a lot of pain associated with having something foreign inserted in your chest. One of the things Traci struggles to do is take it easy. She definitely tries to jam as much in to each day as humanly possible. Despite feeling like a party pooper, Traci still pushes herself to be social and to help around the house. She's really quite incredible. If we can just convince her that it is okay to take a break now and again and just let herself recover, I think she'll continue to be the awesome person we know she is.
Happiness is...
...spending the weekend with your family! Traci brought Aedan and Will home from Aunt Jeannie's house this weekend and it has buoyed her spirits tremendously. At the end of last week, Traci was home-sick for her children. The reunion has been everything she could possibly have wanted and more.
The kids are thrilled to be back in Centerville and enjoying their new bedroom at Grandma's house. Aedan has written and performed many songs in tribute to her new room, most of them are titled, "Yay, Room!" or a variation thereof. If you ask her what she likes about it, she's quick to respond, "EVERYTHING!" Life is good.
Finn is still with Aunt Micky, and when Traci visited him on Friday, she realized that Aunt Micky and Finn have a very special bond. There is no doubt that the two of them adore each other, which makes leaving him with her very easy.
Grandma's house has been a flurry of activity with the kids there along with Aunt Char in town from Alabama. In celebration having the family together, dad made his famous chocolate chip cookies today. I heard they were his best batch, ever. I'm quite jealous.
The only less-than-fabulous update is that Traci is starting to look every bit the part of a cancer patient. Her hair is starting to fall out in patches, which makes her look a little pathetic. Hopefully, it will help her get ridiculous amounts of sympathy as she makes outings with the kids. And luckily for her, she has a beautifully shaped head--which means that it's okay if she doesn't have hair. Thank goodness it's not Mike going through this. That kid has a lumpy head. He would look ridiculous without hair. (Sorry, Mike--but you know it's true!)
So, things are going well in the Allan-Spencer households! Keep those happy thoughts coming and feel free to celebrate a little for the good times in life! So, go and eat a chocolate chip cookie. Eat an extra one for me...and think of Traci while you do!
The kids are thrilled to be back in Centerville and enjoying their new bedroom at Grandma's house. Aedan has written and performed many songs in tribute to her new room, most of them are titled, "Yay, Room!" or a variation thereof. If you ask her what she likes about it, she's quick to respond, "EVERYTHING!" Life is good.
Finn is still with Aunt Micky, and when Traci visited him on Friday, she realized that Aunt Micky and Finn have a very special bond. There is no doubt that the two of them adore each other, which makes leaving him with her very easy.
Grandma's house has been a flurry of activity with the kids there along with Aunt Char in town from Alabama. In celebration having the family together, dad made his famous chocolate chip cookies today. I heard they were his best batch, ever. I'm quite jealous.
The only less-than-fabulous update is that Traci is starting to look every bit the part of a cancer patient. Her hair is starting to fall out in patches, which makes her look a little pathetic. Hopefully, it will help her get ridiculous amounts of sympathy as she makes outings with the kids. And luckily for her, she has a beautifully shaped head--which means that it's okay if she doesn't have hair. Thank goodness it's not Mike going through this. That kid has a lumpy head. He would look ridiculous without hair. (Sorry, Mike--but you know it's true!)
So, things are going well in the Allan-Spencer households! Keep those happy thoughts coming and feel free to celebrate a little for the good times in life! So, go and eat a chocolate chip cookie. Eat an extra one for me...and think of Traci while you do!
Extra Thanks!
I posted a blog entry about the amazing awesomeness of my mom's co-workers, Marianne, Margret, Lisa and Ginny, who volunteered to help weed Traci's garden yesterday, but I wanted to put it here, too. They joined my dad's friend, Ted (and his wife) as some of the greatest friends possible.
Weeding is back-breaking work and it is hard enough to keep up with your own yard. To volunteer to take on almost an acre of someone else's yard without looking for anything in return (not even praise--which was clear because they SNUCK over to Traci's house), is incredible and goes to show what classy people they are. Ted and his wife spent several days working in Traci's yard with my dad and me and we accomplished an amazing amount; however, the weeds popped back up after several weeks of neglect. Not to fear! Mom's friends swept in yesterday and made the yard look better than ever.
My family is truly lucky to be surrounded by so many fabulous people. It is so comforting to know that our support structure is made up of unbelievable pillars of strength. Thank you so much for running with the suggestion (is it true you got the idea from this site? If so, super-duper kudos) and making it a reality. You've made everyone glow with joy.
Weeding is back-breaking work and it is hard enough to keep up with your own yard. To volunteer to take on almost an acre of someone else's yard without looking for anything in return (not even praise--which was clear because they SNUCK over to Traci's house), is incredible and goes to show what classy people they are. Ted and his wife spent several days working in Traci's yard with my dad and me and we accomplished an amazing amount; however, the weeds popped back up after several weeks of neglect. Not to fear! Mom's friends swept in yesterday and made the yard look better than ever.
My family is truly lucky to be surrounded by so many fabulous people. It is so comforting to know that our support structure is made up of unbelievable pillars of strength. Thank you so much for running with the suggestion (is it true you got the idea from this site? If so, super-duper kudos) and making it a reality. You've made everyone glow with joy.
HOORAY! Chemo Round Two: DONE
Today was round two of chemotherapy for Traci and she went in with her superhero cape flowing behind her to kick some major butt. The day started out on the right foot as her blood-work came back with positive numbers. Her liver function is good, her LDH (which indicates how quickly cancer grows) is down (which is good!) and there are no new metastases. That news helped carry her though the all day saga of getting chemo injected into her new chest port for several hours. When snack time came, Traci downed some graham crackers and a (delicious, no doubt) chocolate Ensure shake. Mmm. Sure, it may not sound great to you--but eating at all while receiving chemo is a big deal.
Speaking of eating, after researching the best ways to keep cancer cells at bay, the family decided to adopt a mostly-vegan diet. I suspect it is something that I could do, but I'm (not so secretly) a little pleased that I can still indulge in milk, eggs and cheese while I'm in California as those are all items I would have a tough time kissing goodbye! I will happily adopt the new lifestyle if it means being there for my awesome sister...so Traci--I pledge to be mostly-vegan whenever I come to visit. I may sneak some cow milk now and again, but I will try my best!
The kids spent last night at Cousin David's house, bonding with their cousins, Nora and Michael. I haven't heard much about the adventure, so David or Alice...if you're reading this, I'd love to hear how things went!
Speaking of eating, after researching the best ways to keep cancer cells at bay, the family decided to adopt a mostly-vegan diet. I suspect it is something that I could do, but I'm (not so secretly) a little pleased that I can still indulge in milk, eggs and cheese while I'm in California as those are all items I would have a tough time kissing goodbye! I will happily adopt the new lifestyle if it means being there for my awesome sister...so Traci--I pledge to be mostly-vegan whenever I come to visit. I may sneak some cow milk now and again, but I will try my best!
The kids spent last night at Cousin David's house, bonding with their cousins, Nora and Michael. I haven't heard much about the adventure, so David or Alice...if you're reading this, I'd love to hear how things went!
36 Hours in Ohio
Over the weekend, we had a mini-family reunion. Michael was lucky enough to be working in the greater Cincinnati area for his job with Deloitte. Because Mike was going to be in Ohio, he decided to fly me to Ohio, as well, for the weekend. That way, we could all be there together, for the first time in quite a while.
Because I had to work Friday and Monday, I flew in on a red-eye, which arrived Saturday morning. The day started right as Mike picked me up from the airport and we headed to downtown Cincinnati for a quick bite to eat and coffee with the delightful Lauren DeLong. After a nice visit (and a delicious cup of Mackinac Island Fudge Coffee), we headed to Warm and Cheerful Centerville to see the family.
There's something fabulous about opening a door and having two adoring kids run up and greet you with an all-encompasing hug. That's what happens every time Mike and I visit. Traci's kids make us feel like a million bucks.
The weekend was a bit of a whirlwind--I suppose that's normal if you only have 36 hours to visit. We played, we laughed, we danced, we bonded. As soon as Traci, Mike and I get in the same room, we revert back to our childhood roles. There's something incredibly magical about siblings. They know you throughout your life. They have shared experiences, shared memories. They know you at every stage in your life--and they remember your stories, even if you were living 5,000 miles away. As I've gotten older, I've really grown to appreciate how amazing it is to have siblings.
I'm so glad that when I spend time with my brother and sister, it's like we've never been apart. It may have been years since we've all been in the same room at the same time, but as soon as we're there--it seems as though it's only been minutes. So, what were the highlights? Dancing Gangnam-style in the foyer. Eating Marion's Pizza. Driving to the airport on Sunday (Traci spent most of the drive doing "wall sits" in the back seat because she wanted to work out). Hanging out with the kids. Playing cars with Willy. Going to the library. Taking photos using dad's tripod. Enjoying life.
Now that I'm back in California (again), I can honestly say that I'm lucky to have the siblings I do. I can't wait for my next trip that will include the whole Allan clan. Mom and dad: you are amazing parents.
Because I had to work Friday and Monday, I flew in on a red-eye, which arrived Saturday morning. The day started right as Mike picked me up from the airport and we headed to downtown Cincinnati for a quick bite to eat and coffee with the delightful Lauren DeLong. After a nice visit (and a delicious cup of Mackinac Island Fudge Coffee), we headed to Warm and Cheerful Centerville to see the family.
There's something fabulous about opening a door and having two adoring kids run up and greet you with an all-encompasing hug. That's what happens every time Mike and I visit. Traci's kids make us feel like a million bucks.
The weekend was a bit of a whirlwind--I suppose that's normal if you only have 36 hours to visit. We played, we laughed, we danced, we bonded. As soon as Traci, Mike and I get in the same room, we revert back to our childhood roles. There's something incredibly magical about siblings. They know you throughout your life. They have shared experiences, shared memories. They know you at every stage in your life--and they remember your stories, even if you were living 5,000 miles away. As I've gotten older, I've really grown to appreciate how amazing it is to have siblings.
I'm so glad that when I spend time with my brother and sister, it's like we've never been apart. It may have been years since we've all been in the same room at the same time, but as soon as we're there--it seems as though it's only been minutes. So, what were the highlights? Dancing Gangnam-style in the foyer. Eating Marion's Pizza. Driving to the airport on Sunday (Traci spent most of the drive doing "wall sits" in the back seat because she wanted to work out). Hanging out with the kids. Playing cars with Willy. Going to the library. Taking photos using dad's tripod. Enjoying life.
Now that I'm back in California (again), I can honestly say that I'm lucky to have the siblings I do. I can't wait for my next trip that will include the whole Allan clan. Mom and dad: you are amazing parents.
No New Brain Tumors!
Traci had her first major follow up with her brain on Monday with Dr. Newton, and it went great. The MRI showed no signs of new growths in Traci's brain and Dr. Newton said everything else looks just as it should! In fact, they decided that Traci doesn't need another brain MRI for TWO months! That's fantastic news.
Traci also go the all-clear to start spinning or swimming for exercise, which will be great for her workout-aching legs. Giving up running has been tough on the legs!
Aunt Chris and Uncle Jon were in town to watch the kids while the family went to Columbus for the doctor's appointment and the kids had a blast with them. Aunt Chris and her husband live in Texas, so getting to visit with them was a very special treat for the whole family. Chris has been an amazing pillar of strength for both my mom and me over the past several months. Her emails, letters and packages have made all of us smile.
The timing of the latest good news couldn't have been better because Traci has lots of other exciting things to focus on: today (Wednesday, August 15) is Willy's birthday and it's Aedan's first day of school! Aedan will be heading off to kindergarten this afternoon while Willy gets some alone time with his brother and family for his b-day. Willy asked for yogurt for his special birthday dessert rather than cake, so I'm anxious to find out what the plan is for the evening's celebration. Papa tried to explain how difficult it is to place candles in yogurt, but despite being a brand new four year old, Willy is struggling to grasp the concept. :p
Traci also go the all-clear to start spinning or swimming for exercise, which will be great for her workout-aching legs. Giving up running has been tough on the legs!
Aunt Chris and Uncle Jon were in town to watch the kids while the family went to Columbus for the doctor's appointment and the kids had a blast with them. Aunt Chris and her husband live in Texas, so getting to visit with them was a very special treat for the whole family. Chris has been an amazing pillar of strength for both my mom and me over the past several months. Her emails, letters and packages have made all of us smile.
The timing of the latest good news couldn't have been better because Traci has lots of other exciting things to focus on: today (Wednesday, August 15) is Willy's birthday and it's Aedan's first day of school! Aedan will be heading off to kindergarten this afternoon while Willy gets some alone time with his brother and family for his b-day. Willy asked for yogurt for his special birthday dessert rather than cake, so I'm anxious to find out what the plan is for the evening's celebration. Papa tried to explain how difficult it is to place candles in yogurt, but despite being a brand new four year old, Willy is struggling to grasp the concept. :p
I'm behind the power curve
I failed to update the site after Traci's third chemo appointment and today was scheduled to be her fourth and I'm just getting around to drafting an update. Sometimes, I'm a bad sister. I'm going to blame the failed updates on fabulous trips home to see Traci in person. I think that's a fair trade off.
As you probably gathered from the first sentence of this particular update, Traci did not receive her fourth round of chemotherapy today. It turns out that her white blood cell count is a little on the low side and chemo would cause her immune system to go into a vacation mode that might allow ordinary germs to become more of a problem than could be easily handled. The timing is probably for the best as Aedan has been exhibiting signs of feeling a little under the weather. I might be to blame for that since I was a little sneezy myself last week before I visited Ohio. I may have been a little stuffy while in Ohio as well....d'oh.
The good news is that Traci's LDH numbers continued to decline and the results from her CT scan showed that her liver tumor is no longer growing. That is not good news, it's GREAT news!! No change is a good thing when it comes to melanoma. Traci's liver function is still good and her spirits are still high! Because of the decreased white blood cell count, Traci is now scheduled to get her next chemo treatment a week from Friday. The doctors expect that her LDH levels will go up a little with the gap in chemo, but hopefully they will go back down again after her next treatment. Fingers crossed!
As you probably gathered from the first sentence of this particular update, Traci did not receive her fourth round of chemotherapy today. It turns out that her white blood cell count is a little on the low side and chemo would cause her immune system to go into a vacation mode that might allow ordinary germs to become more of a problem than could be easily handled. The timing is probably for the best as Aedan has been exhibiting signs of feeling a little under the weather. I might be to blame for that since I was a little sneezy myself last week before I visited Ohio. I may have been a little stuffy while in Ohio as well....d'oh.
The good news is that Traci's LDH numbers continued to decline and the results from her CT scan showed that her liver tumor is no longer growing. That is not good news, it's GREAT news!! No change is a good thing when it comes to melanoma. Traci's liver function is still good and her spirits are still high! Because of the decreased white blood cell count, Traci is now scheduled to get her next chemo treatment a week from Friday. The doctors expect that her LDH levels will go up a little with the gap in chemo, but hopefully they will go back down again after her next treatment. Fingers crossed!
A long overdue update
Hello, friends. It's been many months since I've updated this site and for that, there is no excuse. It seemed for a while like things were all going fairly well. The liver tumors had been stable and Traci's LDH numbers were headed in the right direction. They might still be...but we are facing a new challenge as we wait to find out.
In Traci's scans last week, a new brain tumor popped up. The good news is that the tumor is still relatively small: 3 cm x 3cm (at least, that's what I heard). Traci will have radiation on Thursday to try and zap the little bugger into nothingness. The good news is that these brain tumors tend to respond to radiation and the radiation oncologist is optimistic about being able to take care of this particular tumor. Also, her oncologist also sees this as an opportunity to see how the liver tumors do without their normal chemotherapy treatments. Traci didn't get her scheduled treatment last Wednesday (Oct 24), so it will be another two weeks before she actually has her next treatment. In that time, the docs should be able to tell just how stable the tumors are and if things go as well as they possibly could, Traci might be eligible to start immunotherapy, rather than chemotherapy, which would be exciting. It's supposed to be easier on the body than chemo and the results have been favorable with other patients with ocular melanoma. So keep those positive thoughts flowing.
In the meantime, Traci continues to kick butt. She still demands on taking the stairs to her appointments (every single flight up to the 11th floor) and is an absolute inspiration to those around her. No surprises there! She totally rocks.
In Traci's scans last week, a new brain tumor popped up. The good news is that the tumor is still relatively small: 3 cm x 3cm (at least, that's what I heard). Traci will have radiation on Thursday to try and zap the little bugger into nothingness. The good news is that these brain tumors tend to respond to radiation and the radiation oncologist is optimistic about being able to take care of this particular tumor. Also, her oncologist also sees this as an opportunity to see how the liver tumors do without their normal chemotherapy treatments. Traci didn't get her scheduled treatment last Wednesday (Oct 24), so it will be another two weeks before she actually has her next treatment. In that time, the docs should be able to tell just how stable the tumors are and if things go as well as they possibly could, Traci might be eligible to start immunotherapy, rather than chemotherapy, which would be exciting. It's supposed to be easier on the body than chemo and the results have been favorable with other patients with ocular melanoma. So keep those positive thoughts flowing.
In the meantime, Traci continues to kick butt. She still demands on taking the stairs to her appointments (every single flight up to the 11th floor) and is an absolute inspiration to those around her. No surprises there! She totally rocks.
New Year: New commitment to updates!
It's January and it's been ages since I sat down and updated this site. I keep making promises to update more often, but then life gets in the way and I fail to do so. However, it's time for a solid update as it's a new year! Welcome, 2013.
This past week, the whole Allan-Spencer clan decided to meet up in Colorado to visit Uncle Michael in his apartment in Boulder. Traci and her kids had not had the opportunity to visit Mike in Colorado, so it was a great adventure for everyone. Our parents flew out along with Traci, Andy, AeFae, Willy and Finn from Ohio for a week while I was able to fly out and join the gang for the weekend. We had a mini-family Christmas on Thursday night before heading to Breckenridge on Friday for a little action in the mountains. Aedan and Willy took ski lessons for the first time, although AeFae only made it a few hours in before succumbing to a bit of a stomach flu. She spent the rest of the day with Traci where they visited the famed Breckenridge roller coaster! Andy, Mike and I all took to the mountain where we showed off our incredible snow sport skills. Andy is basically a professional skier (no exaggeration) and Mike and I tried to look like rock stars on our snowboards without dying.
On Saturday, the family headed to the Kids Museum in Denver. Each one of Traci's kids found something that kept them overwhelmingly entertained at the museum. For Finn, it was the toddler's room where he could run, climb, slide and put things in boxes all on his own. For Willy, it was the room full of balls--where he could make tracks for the balls to roll down or send them shooting through the air. Although he was also quite fond of the shop area where he got to hammer, saw, screw, cut and design projects of his own. Aedan had an amazing time in the bubble room where she popped countless bubbles and created some of the largest dish soap bubbles any of us have ever seen! Andy, Traci, Mom and I spent the day chasing the kids around and trying to keep up with their endless energy while Michael and dad had a chance to watch some quality football and hang out with Jimmy DuBay.
Sunday brought a family reunion. After a quick afternoon trip to downtown Boulder for lunch with Jimmy DuBay, Andy, Traci, Mike, the kids and I all headed to the bowling alley where we met up with Ross and Kelly Allan and their twin boys, Ben and Sam. Traci hadn't had a chance to meet Ross and Kelly's kids nor had Ross had the chance to meet Andy or any of Traci's kids! Ross was our favorite cousin growing up (sorry other cousins who are reading this....) so it was truly a joyful reunion for everyone. The kids, while tentative at first, quickly became friends and bonded over similar pants and their love of reading. After bowling, we all headed to Mike's apartment for dinner where our parents had a delicious dinner of tacos waiting for us upon our arrival! We all feasted, the kids bonded (and kept themselves completely entertained) and had a great opportunity to catch up.
Sadly, I had to leave on Monday to head to Texas, but I hear that the rest of the family had a great day at the Science Museum in Denver where the kids marveled at dinosaurs and mummies while the adults enjoyed all the other exhibits!
Today (Thursday), Traci was back in the hospital to get another round of Chemo. As far as the cancer goes, she continues to be stable, which is AWESOME news. The tumor in her liver is neither growing nor shrinking, which is almost as good as we could hope for. Her liver function continues to be better than any of the doctors can believe and she is in incredible spirits (no surprise there).
The vacation to Colorado was much needed by everyone, myself included. There is nothing better than having the whole family together, even if it's just for a few days. I can't wait for the next reunion...whenever it will be.
Thanks to Jimmy, Ross, Kelly, Sam and Ben for making the trip out to visit us in Boulder and super thanks to Mom, Dad, Andy, Traci, Ae, Will, & Finn for making the trip from Ohio and to Mike for hosting all of us!! What a great way to spend the beginning of the year!!! :D
This past week, the whole Allan-Spencer clan decided to meet up in Colorado to visit Uncle Michael in his apartment in Boulder. Traci and her kids had not had the opportunity to visit Mike in Colorado, so it was a great adventure for everyone. Our parents flew out along with Traci, Andy, AeFae, Willy and Finn from Ohio for a week while I was able to fly out and join the gang for the weekend. We had a mini-family Christmas on Thursday night before heading to Breckenridge on Friday for a little action in the mountains. Aedan and Willy took ski lessons for the first time, although AeFae only made it a few hours in before succumbing to a bit of a stomach flu. She spent the rest of the day with Traci where they visited the famed Breckenridge roller coaster! Andy, Mike and I all took to the mountain where we showed off our incredible snow sport skills. Andy is basically a professional skier (no exaggeration) and Mike and I tried to look like rock stars on our snowboards without dying.
On Saturday, the family headed to the Kids Museum in Denver. Each one of Traci's kids found something that kept them overwhelmingly entertained at the museum. For Finn, it was the toddler's room where he could run, climb, slide and put things in boxes all on his own. For Willy, it was the room full of balls--where he could make tracks for the balls to roll down or send them shooting through the air. Although he was also quite fond of the shop area where he got to hammer, saw, screw, cut and design projects of his own. Aedan had an amazing time in the bubble room where she popped countless bubbles and created some of the largest dish soap bubbles any of us have ever seen! Andy, Traci, Mom and I spent the day chasing the kids around and trying to keep up with their endless energy while Michael and dad had a chance to watch some quality football and hang out with Jimmy DuBay.
Sunday brought a family reunion. After a quick afternoon trip to downtown Boulder for lunch with Jimmy DuBay, Andy, Traci, Mike, the kids and I all headed to the bowling alley where we met up with Ross and Kelly Allan and their twin boys, Ben and Sam. Traci hadn't had a chance to meet Ross and Kelly's kids nor had Ross had the chance to meet Andy or any of Traci's kids! Ross was our favorite cousin growing up (sorry other cousins who are reading this....) so it was truly a joyful reunion for everyone. The kids, while tentative at first, quickly became friends and bonded over similar pants and their love of reading. After bowling, we all headed to Mike's apartment for dinner where our parents had a delicious dinner of tacos waiting for us upon our arrival! We all feasted, the kids bonded (and kept themselves completely entertained) and had a great opportunity to catch up.
Sadly, I had to leave on Monday to head to Texas, but I hear that the rest of the family had a great day at the Science Museum in Denver where the kids marveled at dinosaurs and mummies while the adults enjoyed all the other exhibits!
Today (Thursday), Traci was back in the hospital to get another round of Chemo. As far as the cancer goes, she continues to be stable, which is AWESOME news. The tumor in her liver is neither growing nor shrinking, which is almost as good as we could hope for. Her liver function continues to be better than any of the doctors can believe and she is in incredible spirits (no surprise there).
The vacation to Colorado was much needed by everyone, myself included. There is nothing better than having the whole family together, even if it's just for a few days. I can't wait for the next reunion...whenever it will be.
Thanks to Jimmy, Ross, Kelly, Sam and Ben for making the trip out to visit us in Boulder and super thanks to Mom, Dad, Andy, Traci, Ae, Will, & Finn for making the trip from Ohio and to Mike for hosting all of us!! What a great way to spend the beginning of the year!!! :D
Continued Stability!
Traci had scans and chemo at the end of February. The good news is that her liver tumors remain stable! It's a good indication that the chemo is keeping things in check, which is great. Typically, most patients can only stay on chemotherapy for a limited amount of time because the drugs are very hard on the body. Because they affect the entire body, not just cancer cells, there is a large number of side effects that can be associated with the treatments. The biggest concern is nerve damage, but the great news is that individuals that are active tend to tolerate the chemo better and have fewer side effects than those that are less active. Since Traci is extremely active, she is tolerating the treatments very well. She is looking fit, happy and healthy, which is awesome.
Inspiring.
Traci continues to be the most inspiring person I know. I can validate how well her brain is working as she has been helping me edit my grad school essays and she is sharp as ever. As I've been reflecting on what is really important to me, I keep coming back to Traci. Her undying optimism, her willingness to fight, her ability to live without regret--that is inspiring beyond words. I hope that I reflect even a small portion of her awesomeness. I want to take what she is--who she is and embrace it. As I consider what I am doing with my life and look at all the options ahead of me, I'm channeling her happy spirit. I'm deciding that whatever happens, I will live without regret. I will make the most of each day I have on this earth and try to do what Traci has done for me--inspire others to do the same.
Meanwhile, Traci continues to get her tri-weekly chemo treatments and scans and is very involved in her treatment. I've been researching other care alternatives and recently came across a clinical trial that might be a good option. I'm hoping she can ask Dr. Kendra about the chances of getting in and if it would be worth it. If you're curious about the clinical trail, more information can be found by clicking here.
Meanwhile, Traci continues to get her tri-weekly chemo treatments and scans and is very involved in her treatment. I've been researching other care alternatives and recently came across a clinical trial that might be a good option. I'm hoping she can ask Dr. Kendra about the chances of getting in and if it would be worth it. If you're curious about the clinical trail, more information can be found by clicking here.
Baby Steps to a Trial
Last Thursday (4/4/13) Traci had her last Chemo treatment at Ohio State...for now. Not sure what to make of this news? Is it good? Is it bad? That was my initial reaction--WTF?! But it's good news! Traci will be starting a *new* treatment next month. At her doctor's appointment, Traci brought up the clinical trial I mentioned in the last post. She asked the medical professionals if she could potentially qualify for the trial and after a little research, her doctors determined that in order to be the best candidate possible, Traci needs to come off of chemo and start immunotherapy.
Traci's tumor has been stable over the past 4 months, which means that the chemo is not being as effective as it was initially, so it's a good time to try something new. We now know that Traci's tumor will respond to the chemo (after a break) so we have that in our back pocket, but it's time to see if there is something else that might be more effective.
Bring in the immunotherapy. As you may remember from an earlier update, Yervoy (the particular immunotherapy) is effective in about 20% of the patients that try it, so please keep those fingers crossed that Traci falls into that category.
Another major reason to push for this change in treatment is that individuals on the clinical trial have had the best results when the trial medications are paired with immunotherapy. The plan is to keep Traci on Yervoy for about the next three months and see how she does on it. That will help determine her eligibility for the clinical trail. Additionally, we need to look into the cost of the trial/treatments. The shots could potentially cost about $10,000 a pop, which would add up quickly if you factor in how many are needed and how often. Yikes.
Traci's tumor has been stable over the past 4 months, which means that the chemo is not being as effective as it was initially, so it's a good time to try something new. We now know that Traci's tumor will respond to the chemo (after a break) so we have that in our back pocket, but it's time to see if there is something else that might be more effective.
Bring in the immunotherapy. As you may remember from an earlier update, Yervoy (the particular immunotherapy) is effective in about 20% of the patients that try it, so please keep those fingers crossed that Traci falls into that category.
Another major reason to push for this change in treatment is that individuals on the clinical trial have had the best results when the trial medications are paired with immunotherapy. The plan is to keep Traci on Yervoy for about the next three months and see how she does on it. That will help determine her eligibility for the clinical trail. Additionally, we need to look into the cost of the trial/treatments. The shots could potentially cost about $10,000 a pop, which would add up quickly if you factor in how many are needed and how often. Yikes.
Immunotherapy and Memories
Traci has now had two immunotherapy sessions and has her next one coming up next week. In the meantime, we've been talking about how to spend the summer. Initially, we'd hoped to take a family vacation to Disneyland. A few years ago, Traci promised Aedan that the family would go to Disneyworld when Aedan turned 8. Sadly, due to the grim prognosis Traci received last year, our family hoped to accelerate the plans. Even more sad, in light of the realization that treatment is expensive, this plan was nixed due to a lack of planning and prohibitive costs. Unwilling to accept the idea of not going at all, I started researching ways to fund a family vacation to make the trip truly feasible.
It turns out that there are a handful (or less) of charities that grant "wishes" to adults in a similar fashion to the "Make-a-Wish" foundation does for children. One is called Memories of Love, which tries to help send a family where a parent has a terminal illness on a short vacation to Florida. Another is called the "Dream Foundation," which grants a final wish for a terminally ill patient. In hopes of getting some financial help to get the family to Disneyworld or Disneyland, I started the application process to both charities. It's also made me realize that there isn't the kind of support for adult cancer patients that there are for children. Of course, we as a society tend to empathize more with children than adults, so it isn't overwhelming surprising that this should be the case. Often, we blame adults for their own illnesses. I know that I can be guilty of this behavior. When I hear someone has developed lung cancer, I automatically assume he or she is a smoker. Likewise, I blame obesity or other unhealthy lifestyles for a number of chronic or terminal illnesses. This is not a very good attitude. Especially when so often the patients had no control over their diagnosis. Like Traci, many victims of terminal illnesses have done everything right: a healthy diet, plenty of exercise, etc. Sometimes life just hands out lemons.
Okay, off my soap box and onto my street corner where I hold up a cardboard sign begging for help.
As I try and help plan a family vacation, I am asking everyone I know to consider donating airline miles to my family so we can fly everyone to either Florida or California to go to a Disney park. If you, or someone you know, has airline miles that they might consider donating to our family, I ask you to reach out and let me know. If I can collect enough points, I might be able to make the vacation a reality.
It turns out that there are a handful (or less) of charities that grant "wishes" to adults in a similar fashion to the "Make-a-Wish" foundation does for children. One is called Memories of Love, which tries to help send a family where a parent has a terminal illness on a short vacation to Florida. Another is called the "Dream Foundation," which grants a final wish for a terminally ill patient. In hopes of getting some financial help to get the family to Disneyworld or Disneyland, I started the application process to both charities. It's also made me realize that there isn't the kind of support for adult cancer patients that there are for children. Of course, we as a society tend to empathize more with children than adults, so it isn't overwhelming surprising that this should be the case. Often, we blame adults for their own illnesses. I know that I can be guilty of this behavior. When I hear someone has developed lung cancer, I automatically assume he or she is a smoker. Likewise, I blame obesity or other unhealthy lifestyles for a number of chronic or terminal illnesses. This is not a very good attitude. Especially when so often the patients had no control over their diagnosis. Like Traci, many victims of terminal illnesses have done everything right: a healthy diet, plenty of exercise, etc. Sometimes life just hands out lemons.
Okay, off my soap box and onto my street corner where I hold up a cardboard sign begging for help.
As I try and help plan a family vacation, I am asking everyone I know to consider donating airline miles to my family so we can fly everyone to either Florida or California to go to a Disney park. If you, or someone you know, has airline miles that they might consider donating to our family, I ask you to reach out and let me know. If I can collect enough points, I might be able to make the vacation a reality.
DISNEYLAND Here we come!!!
As of tomorrow, the Allan family will be departing for LAX to converge in Disneyland! We are so excited.
The Happiest Place on Earth
In early October, the whole family had a chance to visit the happiest place on Earth: Disneyland. Traci planned the whole trip down to where we needed to go each day to maximize our experience and she did a PERFECT job. Everything was wonderful from the condo where we stayed (which was within walking distance to the park...so great), to the experiences we had. The highlight for me was watching Crush (from Finding Nemo) have a live, animated conversation with Traci and Aedan. It was amazing! He asked them questions and responded to their answers and even had the perfect facial expressions to accompany the responses. The older kids (Traci, Mike, Andy and me) along with mom and dad (or grandma and papa) had the chance to ride some of the more thrilling rides like the Tower of Terror and (of course) Space Mountain. We also visited California Great Adventure where Finn got to spend time with his favorite character from Cars, Mater. Traci could not have done a better job planning the trip and everything worked out fabulously. There is nothing better than the chance to make lasting memories with the family. I love being an Allan.
Goodbye Yervoy, Hello Chemo
We got some crappy news in late October; the Yervoy Traci'd been on for the past few months has not been working and her tumors have been growing. Her liver tumor has continued to invade the space of her other organs. Most recently, it's decided to take up the space that used to house her right lung. Luckily, Traci decided she didn't need that lung anyway and continues to hike, work out and keep up with the kids with just her left lung.
The doctors decided to put her back on the chemo she was on before that seemed to slow the growth of the tumors for a while hoping to get her LDH numbers down. After the first treatment, her numbers dropped a whopping 800 points, but still sit higher than ever. After her second treatment, her numbers only took a baby step in the right direction, but as we are constantly reminded, stable is good for this disease. Even no movement is considered good news.
On top of dealing with her treatment, losing her hair again and the annoying side effects of undergoing chemo, Traci was in a head-on collision right before Thanksgiving. The accident was a result of her being in the wrong place at the wrong time. She was sitting at a stop sign when an elderly woman pulled out in front of another car. Both cars saw (too late) that this was going to be a problem. Traci initially thought, "Wow..I am about to be a witness to a car accident! I'm going to have to stick around and give a statement to the police." As the cars collided, they started to slide towards her as she sat and watched. As the vehicles moved in her direction, her thoughts quickly changed to, "Uh oh. I think they might hit me. I wish I were a stunt car driver because then my reflexes would allow me to throw my car in reverse and get out of the way before....." CRAAAASH! Nope. Too late. Both cars slammed into Traci's minivan. As the hood collapsed and the seat belts hugged Traci to the seat, she realized that modern technology is pretty nifty. Cars are designed to absorb a majority of the impact in accidents, so the front end of her car was rather smashed in as it accepted the force of two cars slamming into it. Thus, her minivan is now in the shop and the family is without the only car that can fit everyone comfortably. What a pain! The insurance company provided a Ford Explorer as an alternative vehicle for the family; however, if you've ever driven a Ford, you may know that they are designed for the average American and everyone in our family is the size of the Average Asian. It's a little funny to see Mom or Traci behind the wheel...mostly because you can't really see them! :p
The doctors decided to put her back on the chemo she was on before that seemed to slow the growth of the tumors for a while hoping to get her LDH numbers down. After the first treatment, her numbers dropped a whopping 800 points, but still sit higher than ever. After her second treatment, her numbers only took a baby step in the right direction, but as we are constantly reminded, stable is good for this disease. Even no movement is considered good news.
On top of dealing with her treatment, losing her hair again and the annoying side effects of undergoing chemo, Traci was in a head-on collision right before Thanksgiving. The accident was a result of her being in the wrong place at the wrong time. She was sitting at a stop sign when an elderly woman pulled out in front of another car. Both cars saw (too late) that this was going to be a problem. Traci initially thought, "Wow..I am about to be a witness to a car accident! I'm going to have to stick around and give a statement to the police." As the cars collided, they started to slide towards her as she sat and watched. As the vehicles moved in her direction, her thoughts quickly changed to, "Uh oh. I think they might hit me. I wish I were a stunt car driver because then my reflexes would allow me to throw my car in reverse and get out of the way before....." CRAAAASH! Nope. Too late. Both cars slammed into Traci's minivan. As the hood collapsed and the seat belts hugged Traci to the seat, she realized that modern technology is pretty nifty. Cars are designed to absorb a majority of the impact in accidents, so the front end of her car was rather smashed in as it accepted the force of two cars slamming into it. Thus, her minivan is now in the shop and the family is without the only car that can fit everyone comfortably. What a pain! The insurance company provided a Ford Explorer as an alternative vehicle for the family; however, if you've ever driven a Ford, you may know that they are designed for the average American and everyone in our family is the size of the Average Asian. It's a little funny to see Mom or Traci behind the wheel...mostly because you can't really see them! :p